Last Updated on October 8, 2022 by Editors Desk
Main highlights:
- Healing Journey
- What is emotional healing
- Signs you are emotionally damaged
Before we talk about starting your healing journey, it is important to talk about your traumatic experiences. Let’s start with a question, are you really fine, or are you suppressing your emotions?
They say that honesty is the best policy, but anyone who has ever resorted to biting their tongue or faking a grin in an uncomfortable social setting knows that there is frequently a time and place for more honest communication. Actually, there are instances when it is just simpler to suppress your sentiments and follow the crowd’s lead than, to be honest about how you really feel in a particular situation.
It is referred to as “surface acting” by psychologists. According to Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D., for Psychology Today, “Surface acting refers to the form of emotional communication when you conceal your genuine sentiments while putting on a fake front.”
People conceal their feelings for many different reasons. It may be to avoid a strong or explosive feeling that is regarded as socially inappropriate or to switch out an uncomfortable feeling for one that is more acceptable. Expectations from those in our lives have an impact on us. Narcissistic abuse frequently results in depression and anxiety.
Trauma victims frequently find it too difficult or are told they are incorrect to analyze their past experiences.
Most people occasionally need to suppress or inhibit their emotions; this helps us manage. People are expected, for instance, to refrain from crying all day long at work. Today’s society expects us to control our emotions.
In order to function—whether at work or to make it through a dysfunctional family—we must suppress our emotions. We must behave respectfully in public places. Most people lack the skills or confidence to express their anger in a different way, and shouting out their rage is looked upon.
To cope, to fit in, to live, to avoid being shamed, or simply because processing trauma is too painful, we hide our feelings.
As long as you are willing to let go of assumptions about how the experience will go or where it will go, emotional healing is always a possibility.
You will never again be the same person you were before whatever it is you are recovering from. That could be unsettling, but it might also be extremely liberating as you look for yourself and go through post-traumatic growth.
Signs of emotional damage
- Crying fits or fits of rage.
- Eating challenges.
- Losing enthusiasm for routine activities
- Symptoms of bodily distress including headaches and stomachaches are getting worse.
- Fatigue.
- Feeling remorseful, powerless, or forlorn.
- Staying away from friends and relatives.
If you have even a few of these signs, you must try to acknowledge your true feelings and get on the path of healing.
What is emotional healing?
The act of recognizing, allowing, accepting, integrating, and processing distressing life experiences and intense emotions is known as emotional healing. It might involve integration, self-control, self-compassion, self-acceptance, and empathy.
Many people have a propensity to try to manage the emotional healing process by reducing the pain and managing their emotions, but this can actually prevent emotional recovery.
If you allow your emotions to be completely acknowledged, felt, processed, and dealt with, they will heal in the time that it takes—which may be longer or shorter than you anticipate or plan for.
Here are 7 ways to start your healing journey:
- “Pain demands to be felt”
This is my favorite quote so far from the book “ The fault in our stars” and it has a deep meaning. Wondering why am I talking about this quote. Because this is more like a life lesson. Whatever you have been through, the pain, the trauma, the abuse, it all needs to be felt and not suppressed. Masking your fears and pain will never do any good at any point in life. So the most important step towards healing is feeling. - Learn acceptance
Accepting yourself the way you are will boost your self-esteem, and confidence and will also help you know your worth and everything you are capable of doing. Self-love is difficult for a person who has been traumatized but it is crucial. Once you accept yourself and find a way to love your body and mind, you come one step closer to your healing journey. - Communicate
To express your emotions, find a way. Silence allows pain to swell. Your pain has tremendous power when you speak it out loud. Shame might hold us back, yet words can make us feel better. We may hide our suffering out of pride, but by talking about it, we may find that others have experienced similar suffering. We can gain from other people’s knowledge when we share. Talk things over with a close friend or family member you trust, find a decent therapist, or share with a trusted friend. Speaking up and expressing your feelings is crucial in this situation. - Set boundaries but don’t block the entrance.
You have the right to set your own restrictions and boundaries in every relationship so that you always feel secure and safe. Any request you don’t want, simply say “no.” You have the right to urge someone to phone you less frequently or possibly not at all. You have the right to request someone to leave if they enter your home when you don’t want them to. Think about your personal limits. They could vary from one person to the next. You might appreciate having your sister over, but you might not want your brother or your cousin to drop by. But it is also important to make sure you are not cutting off everyone in your life. Sometimes it is important to have people by your side and also for you to be by their side in need. - Thank yourself for every little milestone you achieve
Gratitude12 Elements of Emotional Intelligence to you. Thank yourself. You are correct. You have come this far despite the emotional suffering that has motivated you to seek emotional healing. Even if they don’t work anymore or weren’t the “healthiest” to begin with, whatever coping mechanisms you employed at the time were effective for you. - Don’t walk alone
We heal better together. Despite the fact that your friends and family are likely eager to assist you, your instinct may be to hide until you are “done” recovering. Contact a person you feel comfortable approaching. Having someone by your side ultimately improves your spirits and gives you the confidence to handle your emotions. Just be aware of whether the individual you choose is the proper one or not. - Taking baby steps is the key.
Try not to “fix” everything at once. It is difficult to recover emotionally from a traumatic event, and whatever happened to you may still be having an impact on you in many ways. Be realistic again and realize that you won’t be able to resolve every aspect of your problem or trauma at once.
Persist in your seat One of the hardest tasks to complete might be this. Many intense emotions, including sadness, despair, and fury, are probably present in you. It’s tempting to want to push those unpleasant emotions aside or get over them quickly. Although it will be unpleasant, healing requires that we acknowledge our difficult emotions. Despite the fact that it may not feel like it, feelings do change.
How do you know you’re healing?
There isn’t a line to cross to prove you’re a totally recovered person! In fact, emotional recovery can occasionally happen so gradually that you might not even be aware of how much you’ve recovered—and other people could even notice it before you.
However, you will know you have made significant progress toward emotional healing if you are able to reflect on a situation without becoming emotionally overwhelmed, if you are able to recover more quickly from setbacks, or if you simply feel more at ease.
It’s possible to find ever-deeper levels of emotional healing. Make an effort to live in a way that respects and encourages your ongoing process of emotional recovery.
